From beer to moon landings: Men can do that, if women make them

I’ve always maintained that were it not for women, men would have stopped inventing things shortly after the advent of beer and television. We are by nature sedentary creatures, content with simple pleasures—happy to scratch, burp and occasionally change the channel from ESPN to CNN.

Women, for whatever reason, expect more of us. And we, for the most part, deliver.

Why? Because women have what we want. No, not that. I’m talking about the niceties of civilization; medicine, democracy, abundant food, soft pillows, Law & Order reruns. Oh, sure, men may have invented most of those things, but we only did it to impress women, to gain their favor.

And, let’s be honest, guys, it just plain feels good when a women assumes you can do something. Whether it’s fixing a broken doorknob or creating a timeless work of art, if a woman looks at you with those big, blue eyes (I’m thinking of The Lovely Mrs. Taylor here) and says, “Can you, honey?”, chances are you’re going to at least give it a shot.

Men are suckers.

I was reminded of this fact last weekend at the annual Fallasburg Park arts and crafts fair. Mrs. T drags me to this thing every year. I say “drags me,” but in truth I enjoy it myself. They have corndogs there.

And I have to admit I’m fascinated by the traditional, old-time crafts, created—often on-site—by area artisans. This year, I saw a woman weaving cane chairs by hand, another operating a real, working spinning wheel. I saw a guy carving furniture from big blocks of oak. There was an artist doing incredibly intricate origami work. It was all way cool.

But at each exhibit, especially those at which I was thinking of actually making a purchase, Mrs. Taylor repeated a variant of the same comment: “You could do that yourself.”

One artist was selling photographs; very good photographs. A large, black-and-white print of a meadow seen on a foggy day especially appealed to me, though the price tag did not. Still, I stood in front of the print for a while, contemplating how nice it would look over the living room sofa.

“You could do that yourself!” Mrs. T said, before I could make any overt moves toward my wallet.

And maybe I could. I’m a decent photographer, own a decent camera, and am possessed of a fair understanding of composition. I will never actually drag myself out of bed on a foggy morning and sit around a dewy field waiting for the moment when the light is perfect, but I could.

The crazy thing is, Mrs. Taylor made that same comment while we were watching the guy who carves chairs. And the origami guy. I can no more carve a chair or do origami than I can levitate or speak Farsi. But apparently, Mrs. T believes I could, if only I applied myself.

Ah, feminine confidence; the grease that smoothes the gears of civilization.

Next summer, we’re thinking about taking a couple days to visit NASA’s Glenn Research Center in Cleveland. I’ve been there before and it’s amazing. They have real moon rocks there, and one of the original Mercury space capsules, though no corn dogs.

I’m looking forward to it, but I’m also a little worried. As we walk past the video footage of moonwalks, lift-offs and Mars Rovers, will Mrs. T glance my way and say, “You could do that.”



More “Reality Check” online at http://mtrealitycheck.blogspot.com or www.milive.com. E-mail Mike Taylor at mtaylor325@gmail.com.